Ask Mr. Bennett

Anonymous asked: Why Mr. Bennett did you not take more action in your children's lives? Your silly wife had to much control!

And good day to you, too, sir! Upon my honour, I rarely come across such candid phrasing as I do on the internet. Perhaps my daughter’s Aunt Catherine is asking questions anonymously? Then again, perhaps not; I am quite sure that Lady Catherine received an education and surely knows the difference between “to” and “too”.

At any rate, I do not care to discuss the intimate details of a lifetime of mistakes (and successes, I assure you- look to my Lizzie for that) between a man and his wife. There are many actions in my life that I do not recall with particular satisfaction, and while I may not enjoy a family with perfect, amiable manners, correct deportment, and quiet propriety, I can assure you that no man could be prouder of his daughters than I.

In short, my friend- I wouldn’t change any of it for the world. Neither the Wickhams nor the occasional shrill raptures of a beloved (albeit silly) wife can disturb my present sanguinity.

But really. You ought to learn the difference between “to” and “too”. That is a failing, perhaps, on the part of one of your own parent’s lackadaisical attention to your education? I assure you, none of my daughters would ever make that mistake.

Ah, I have my Lizzie in my head, chiding me for ungentlemanly conduct toward you. Alas, she is not here to take this keyboard away. Take care, my anonymous friend! Appeal to Google for grammatical assistance, and I’ll keep to my own regarding the conduct of my children.